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jardMail LogojardMail » FactsLists » What Mum Taught Me<!-- Header End -->What Mum Taught MeMum taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE: "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning!" Mum taught me RELIGION: "You'd better pray that will come out of the carpet." Mum taught me about TIME TRAVEL: "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" Mum taught me LOGIC: "Because I said so, that's why." Mum taught me FORESIGHT: "Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident." Mum taught me IRONY: "Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about." Mum taught me about the science of OSMOSIS: "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!" Mum taught me about CONTORTIONISM: "Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!" Mum taught me about STAMINA: "You'll sit there until all that spinach is finished." Mum taught me about WEATHER: "It looks as if a tornado swept through your room." Mum taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS: "If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?"
Mum taught me about HYPOCRISY: "If I've told you once, I've told you a million times - Don't exaggerate!!!" Mum taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION: "Stop acting like your father!" Mum taught me about ENVY: "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!" And most of all ..... Mum taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE: "I brought you into this world-and I can take you out." <!-- End of page FOOTER inserted here -->

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